Finding a Pen Pal for Your Senior Loved One

We all want to help our senior loved ones be as happy and comfortable as possible in their golden years. One of the most overlooked aspects of caring for our senior loved ones is making sure that they remain socially connected to people who make them feel heard and valued. One of the easiest ways to plug our senior loved ones into the world around them is the time-honored tradition of written correspondence. Simply put, good old fashioned pen pals for seniors!

In some ways, the practice of penning neatly written longhand letters is a lost art. But it doesn’t have to be with dedicated and engaged pen pals for seniors. Sitting down at the kitchen table to share their thoughts and dreams can be a soothing trip down “memory lane” for a senior.

Now, if they are more technologically inclined, they can hammer out communications on the keyboard of their computer or cell phone. Regardless of the method of communication they choose, the important thing is keeping your senior loved one connected to the world and people around them.

Top benefits of pen pals for seniors:

Preventing loneliness

One of the most common problems seniors face is isolation and loneliness. If they live alone and no longer drive a car, for example, it’s especially tough to stay social and do the things they want to do. Finding a pen pal is something Mom or Dad can do from the comfort of their own home for very little cost.

Finding new friends

It’s always great to have someone to share common interests with. It’s never too late in life to make new friends, and that’s especially important if your senior loved one has recently undergone a major life change such as losing their spouse or moving from their familiar family home to a senior living community.

Anyone can do it

You don’t need to be computer or smartphone savvy to stay in touch. If Mom or Dad isn’t good with texting, they can still communicate with their pen pal by putting pen to paper. Maybe your senior loved one is hard of hearing, making it difficult to talk on the phone. Writing their thoughts down will help them bridge that communication gap. Even if they’re not good with typing or writing longhand, they can use voice recognition software to type their message for them.

Reducing depression and anxiety

Putting your thoughts down on paper and sharing them with others can be therapeutic for someone who feels isolated, alone and depressed. Studies also prove that exercising our language skills and being creative are key to keeping our cognitive skills sharp as we age.

Gives them something to look forward to

While writing a message can be therapeutic for the author, getting one in return can be even more fun! It’s always exciting to get a piece of mail you’ve been waiting for. Getting a response is a great incentive to your senior loved one, and hopefully will encourage them to keep the conversation going and get to work on their next reply.

Where do you start?

There are lots of ways to find pen pals for seniors including:

• Ask your family first. Your senior loved one would probably like nothing better than to feel connected to a grandchild or great-grandchild they don’t get to see as often as they would like. What’s happening at school? How did their ball game go? There’s always plenty to talk about when it comes to family. Plus, those letters shared will be cherished and passed down for years to come.
• Check with local schools and community organizations. School kids often love to have the opportunity to ask seniors first-hand what life was like when they grew up. Instead of reading about historical events, they can learn from someone who “was actually there!” Local churches, rotary clubs and volunteer organizations can also be great places to find a pen pal.
• Contacting formal pen pal programs: Organizations exist to match willing pen pal partners. They include Pen Pals for Life or Postcrossing.

Once seniors find a pen pal, there are a few important rules of the road to follow. Remind your senior loved one that it’s important not to share any personal or sensitive information, including anything about finances or banking. They should never share any information with their pen pal that they wouldn’t want the general public to know. Keep the conversation light and casual, focusing on hobbies, everyday life and topics older adults are interested in.

Ask your senior loved one today if they’d like to find themselves a pen pal, and have fun writing!

For more tips on helping your loved one create rewarding relationships, visit Bethesda’s blog.